Woes

I have a fifty dollar and increasing library book fine.
I lost the book probably 20 odd, and overdue fines are 20 odd too.
Everyday I think of going to pay the fines that accumulate with each day but then I also think of finding the book too. Cos if it's not there, it must be somewhere.

And this is going to continue for months. I should just fuck it and pay everything when school reopens.

$50 = 3 times cab fare (non peak hour)
2 times cab fare (peak hour)
Lunch for 10 days in school
6 Venti Starbucks cofffee
Heartbreak

Tears well up

Sonia who you just met a day ago, according to you was the hottest girl in the world, so perfect you stuttered when she spoke to you. I acknowledge the fact that her looks were beyond amazing and was fine with everything till

"If Jasmine wants you back and Sonia wants you, who would you go for?"
"Thats a tough one."
"Huh, you really don't know who to choose?"
"I mean yeah la, it's difficult what."

Then you say I'm sorry.
And I wonder how a year of memories could even begin to compare to a pretty sight at night.

You constantly speak of how much you're going through, how much you're suffering.
What about the hurt I feel?
I am merely human.

Hot mess

You'll never know how strong you are.
Until being strong is the only choice you have.

10 things

Favourite Bubble Tea: Oreo Spin from Cold Rock

Favourite flowers: White roses

Favourite Quote: Fall down seven times. Stand up eight.

Best thing about myself: Very independent

Worst thing about myself: Too fat

Cannot resist: Guys who smile/laugh cheekily & then blows you a kiss

Hate: Arrogance

Which love language: Gifts

Miss: Z.R.X.S.R.S.S.

Cannot live without: Cold water

Options

You get me smiling in my sleep one night.
And crying to sleep the next.

Adele

There's a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch, and it's bringing me out the dark
Finally I can see you crystal clear
Go ahead and sell me out and I'll lay your ship there
See how I'll leave with every piece of you
Don't underestimate the things that I will do

There's a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch
And it's bringing me out the dark

The scars of your love remind me of us
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless
I can't help feeling

We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You had my heart inside of your hand
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
And you played it to the beat
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)

Baby, I have no story to be told
But I've heard one of you
And I'm gonna make your head burn

Think of me in the depths of your despair
Making a home down there
As mine sure won't be shared

The scars of your love remind me of us
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless
I can't help feeling

We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You had my heart inside of your hand
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
And you played it to the beat
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)


Throw your soul through every open door
Count your blessings to find what you look for
Turn my sorrow into treasured gold
You pay me back in kind and reap just what you sow

But you played it
You played it
You played it
You played it to the beat.

Rolling in the deep

These weeks have been crazy. I've been particularly unlucky with practically everything.

Had another crappy situation with my CT on Thursday, experienced the most embarrassing moment right before Econs lecture on Friday and finally, Lester broke the LCD of my phone by accident yesterday.

Being so down on luck is insanely frustrating.

On the bright side, Kamalia won The One and made me so proud. This is the 2nd year where my friends dedicated their performance to me hehe. First Amanda, now Kamalia. I was so proud of that cheeky girl & I know that this win is exactly what she needed.

So yesterday, after a slight breakdown in school(Yes, I cry easily), I came home to this:





(I know this is not the nicest picture cos I'm all hot and sweaty from school)

No one could be any sweeter and it is the perfect moment when I needed to reason to smile & know that despite anything, someone would still have my back.

You have stuck with me through thick and thin and I am not the easiest girl to handle with all my crazy demands but you held on. You have never let go and I know you never will.
Thank you for being the best.
I don't deserve you and all of this, but I am truly happy that you would go through such expense just to see me happy.

Cheers to many more years to come.

Intensity

Slept at 5am, woke again at 8am.

Much to do, much to think about.

Butterflies

Transparent and intrusive? You are a fucking dictator and 90% of my friends can speak English better than you. I cannot wait to see you fall five years later.

**********************************************************************

So nervous & surprising worried for the results of the General Election. Been waiting since 9.30!

I cannot believe (or I choose not to believe) the rumours that PAP have lost Aljunied and Hougang. I mean seriously, look closely at the opposition. Promises of using ten million of our budget for full employment? That is totally unrealistic. Ten million from where, oppositions' pockets? It is still from the high tax (or even higher tax) that we fellow Singaporeans pay.
All who takes History know exactly why a country like Singapore CANNOT survive on a coalition government.

I get really angry at people who support opposition just because it's cool & controversial.

PAP winning four GRCS so far. But still so anxious! Won't be able to sleep in peace if George Yeo loses Aljunied.